Election night

I have tuned in throughout the evening to watch the coverage on the election.
Discovering that something as simple as changing the station could portray the election in whole different light
It is hard to not remember another election night 16 years ago where I spent most of the night watching election coverage at the time I thought my inability to sleep was due to the election and wanting to know who won. Even after the winner had been announced I still couldn't sleep
I woke to a phone call the next morning from my dad and soon after the news that my mom had died.  
Finding that often today my thoughts have drifted back to that time.
My mom had offered to keep the kids while I went to vote I had said no telling her that I felt it was important that they go with to see what voting is about. I spent quite a bit of time in the days that followed feeling guilt that we hadn't seen her that night before.  
Hind sight so poetic is it not?
Today I went to the polls with my youngest, yes I still believe it is important to share and teach my kids what a privilege and honor it is to have the right to vote...my how things have changed in these 16 years, I wonder what she would think of these new little ones in my .life, I sense she would love them as much as those older ones ...I realize today that the guilt in those early days  for that choice I made on that election night was an unfair burden to add to my days....she certainly wouldn't have wanted me to feel that way.

I miss her daily..


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