saying goodbye

We are never prepared for the phone call that comes telling us that someone has passed away.
Shock, disbelief, sadness, are just a few of the feelings that can pass thru your system in just but a blink as you hear those words and then begin to try to make sense of them. This morning my dad called to tell me that Colleen had passed away sometime during the night. There was no sign, no illness or disease, she simply went to sleep last night and didn't wake up.
Colleen and my dad have been together several years now (forgive as I type this I simply can't recall how long my brain is just too tired)
They have known each other for years, my dad and mom were friends with colleen and her husband living across the street from each other...I remember many an afternoon at Colleens while her and my mom had coffee. After my mom died they reconnected over of all things a concert. My sister and I had given my dad tickets to see a country music singer, and then had wondered which of us was going to have to go with him, neither of us real eager to sit thru this particular performance. Imagine our surprise when he said he was bringing Colleen. I recall saying to my sister "who knew dad could find his own date" Imagine how weird it was to realize your dad could date... and yet I couldn't asked for a better person to be in my dad's life. She was a gift to him and to us. As time passed and they spent more time together, Colleen simply fit into our lives, present at every birthday party, and holiday celebration, joining us for summer gatherings, or kid's activities. Perhaps the most amazing thing was not those family celebrations she attended but the things she had my father doing, trips to the zoo, hiking at a park, shopping, eating Chinese food.... I remember at first it was quite common for me to say to my dad "you did what?" It goes without saying these were not things he had done while my mom was alive. It was wonderful to see him living his life, and gasp enjoying it. I will always be grateful for the life she added to my dad's world.
I will miss her.
Tonight my heart is heavy, seeing my dad carry sadness once again is difficult to say the least, made all the more so, since there is nothing I can do to fix it for him. I am sad for the loss her family is now trying to understand, almost instantly today my heart remembered that place of so many emotions when you are told your mother has died, my prayers are with them as they move from this day into a new normal that no longer includes their mother.
Tonight I find that mixed in with my tears and sadness there is also some peace and happiness. Found simply in the way she lived her life, how she shared it with her family, friends and those she knew. Colleen I am grateful for sharing a small part of your life, I am thankful for the example your life was.